Forget This.

What the hell is your problem you stupid slut?
You think it's okay to just date a guy for a year, fall in love with him, then break up with him out of nowhere on Valentines Day, and that's it? Nothing is left?
You go out, you party, you dance, you drink, and now you're hanging out with guys and almost getting kissed.
Yeah, must be nice, asshole.
Don't mind me, I'm just a mess over here, using all my strength just not to think of you.
I wanna fucking kill you, you piss me off so much.
You're a heartless bitch.
I hope you enjoy all these guys you're getting. One must not have been good enough for you.

Why do I keep going back to you? You're not gonna date me again. You're never going to have feelings for me. Don't sit there and say "Yeah, well, anything can happen." Because I'm not stupid. I'm not.
I know I'm not good with relationships, but I'm not completely clueless with them.
I know when I'm being taken for granted. And it's a horrible feeling.
Isn't it enough that you broke me as a person? But now you have all this shit on top of it to make me feel even worse. Give me a reason why I should waste my time and go see you? Give me a reason.
Because, how I see it, this is how it's going to go.

1. We'll meet, and I'll think you look amazing, and you were worth everything. While you would think "Eh, he's okay. Not what I expected."

2. I'd take you out to dinner and we'd hang out, and I'd be having the time of my life, because the wait was so worth it. Meanwhile, you'd probably be praying for time to go by faster.

3. At the end of the day, I'd be lucky to get a kiss on the cheek. But I'd still be happy. Because I met you.
Later that night, you'd tell me you wanna be friends. And that'll be that. My Spring Break would be ruined.


That's how it's gonna go. I know it.
Just admit it, you're better. You're prettier, you're more talented, you deserve better.
Yes, I know. I'm not stupid. I knew this from the start. Do you understand why I thought I was lucky? Because I had somebody I would normally not be able to get. And this hurts. This is killing me.
I try to ignore you, I try to get over you.
But it doesn't. Fucking. Work.
What do I have to do? Do I have to kill myself just to relieve the pain?
Do I have to go out and be a man-whore and party and make out with as many drunk girls as I can, to get my mind off of you? Tell me what to do, because I seriously have no clue. And this is getting ridiculous.